Mindful Photography

Fierce Compassion: Speaking Truth to Power

Fierce Compassion: Speaking Truth to Power | Photo of Agapanthus buds by Mary Marcdante

May we all speak truth to power with fierce compassion—for others and ourselves.

On several of my walks this week, I was captivated by this same lavender-colored Agapanthus pod of buds, all crowded together like its own little flower community getting ready to bloom something beautiful. Then I noticed one bud that was somehow forced out and laid deflated on top of the others. With the next breath of wind, it would soon fall to the ground and never get a chance to bloom like the others.

As I’ve been reviewing my photos from the past few days, I paused again at the image several times. I’ve never thought about flowers that way. “Why now?” I asked myself.

I closed my eyes and took a few breaths, sitting with the question. My answer surprised me:

Maybe because it’s easier to watch a flower die than a human?

I felt tears well up and let my heart keep talking. Between mounting COVID deaths—my Aunt Francie included, the horrific murder of George Floyd, and the riots in Minneapolis and protests around the country attempting to speak truth to power and be heard by people with that power, this heart aches—again.

“I can’t breathe.” George Floyd

I can only imagine and barely touch the grief family members are experiencing as they lose people they love through racism, agism, narcissism and every other “ism” that divides rather than encourages the gifts and answers that a diverse community and world offers humanity, nature and the earth. I know others who are feeling this, maybe you are too?

Every flower bud and every human being needs a safe home and community that protects, provides and motivates them to grow into their full potential: Agapanthus buds, Torrey Pine trees, George Floyd, Armaud Arbery, Breonna Taylor, you, me—all of us, and the rest of the world.

What will it take to create that space for everyone?

I’m discovering one answer for myself through the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion: F I E R C E C O M P A S S I O N. Even when it’s scary, maybe especially when it’s scary, learning to use your anger at injustice to motivate you, your courage to protect yourself and others, and your voice to provide awareness, understanding, and connection within your community, your friends, your family, and most importantly, within yourself.

“It only takes one person
and a good idea to start a movement.
-Maren Johnson

What inside you is waiting to be listened to and compassionately acted on by you today? What in your world needs your voice to speak up with fierce compassion?

May we all find and use our courage and voices to help the world bloom into all the beauty, joy, and love that lives within us.

Agapanthus blooms by Mary Marcdante
“Riots are the language of the unheard.” -Martin Luther King Jr.
May we all listen to each other for
greater understanding and connection.

Bioluminescence and Mindful Self Compassion

Bioluminescence at Scripps Pier, La Jolla Shores on May 7, 2020. Unedited iPhone 11 Max Pro photo by Mary Marcdante.
Bioluminescence at Scripps Pier, La Jolla Shores on May 7, 2020. Unedited iPhone 11 Max Pro photo by Mary Marcdante.

Full moon bioluminescence at La Jolla Shores just before midnight—a welcome respite and reminder of nature’s gifts to inspire and renew in troubling times.

I took three walks today trying to shake off this sadness that’s been welling up. I find myself thinking more and more about how many people have died from COVID and all of the underlying manmade causes contrasted with the spin so many people are trying to put on the unbelievable suffering the world is experiencing—“But look how many people have survived and how many of us are still alive.” I understand it’s a way to assuage fear and stress but it’s not working for me right now. My healthy and privileged life for which I’m incredibly grateful also secretly feels shameful these days. I’m beginning to understand what survivor’s guilt might feel like and how important it is to acknowledge and feel the thoughts and feelings rather than dismiss them or spin them and then…

I’m learning, I hope, from my mindful self-compassion teacher training that when I notice struggle in myself to pause and name it; remember all people suffer in various ways, some like me and I’m not alone; and then do something kind for myself so that I can be more fully present for and kind to others.

So I went to see the bioluminescence. Do you know what that spectacle really is besides magic? I didn’t. I just knew that it sounded cool and I wanted to see it. So I went at 11 o’clock at night and for the moments the waves sparkled against the night sky, I felt my spirit leap and my heart connect with others who were wearing their masks and socially distancing along side me while we “wowed” in unison each time a blue wave crested.

Now that I’m back home sitting with the magic of the blue waves and the COVID news reports, and having looked up what bioluminescence is, the inner darkness has lifted a bit. I realize there is a link for me between nature’s bioluminescence and all the healthcare and “essential” workers showing up day after day in service to saving lives through this COVID crisis and actually, every day of our lives.

The definition of bioluminescence is “the production of light by living organisms.” All these frontline healthcare and essential workers–and you, and me–are human bioluminescence producing light. And what is light but love made visible?

You are light. Live the bioluminescence you already are.

Inspired Action: The Power of Savoring

S A V O R . . .

What did you savor today? What could you savor now?

Since quarantine started over a month ago, I have been aching to stand on the sand at sunset at Torrey Pines beach. Tonight was no different. I felt the familiar disappointment as I walked out my door for a walk in my neighborhood at sunset. As I reached a canyon overlook where a tree had recently been cut down, I felt sad for the loss of this beautiful tree and then happened to glance over my right shoulder and saw the sky melting into shades of butter that reminded me of the butterscotch oatmeal cookies I’d baked earlier in the afternoon that called for two sticks of butter—haha, with half the batch already eaten and savored.

I paused to drink in the sky and felt tears well up. I took a deep breath and inhaled the scent of eucalyptus, one of my mother’s favorite fragrances. I heard the wind rustle through the canyon and felt it brush my cheeks. I could still taste the butterscotch and oatmeal cookies in my mouth. I also noticed I was smiling without trying and felt a warmth flow into my heart. To paraphrase a prayer from childhood, “Blessed be life. Blessed be nature. Blessed be me.”

We double our pleasure when present moments and past enjoyable memories meet. Triple delight when we pause long enough to allow the thoughts and memories to flow from our mind into our body and practice savoring through sensory awareness.

One of the key elements of mindful self-compassion to lessen feeling bad and increase feeling good is using our senses to savor a beautiful moment or anything that we find lovely, inspiring or touching. So often we don’t even notice the exquisiteness around us because we’re caught in a negative thought loop us or we move on so quickly and forget to feel the good feelings moving through our senses. Yet, savoring is one the great gifts of being alive.

Next time you notice something that makes you smile or feel good, slow down and let yourself enjoy it a little longer. In your mind walk through your senses—What am I seeing? What am I hearing? What am I smelling? What am I tasting? What am I touching? What am I feeling emotionally? Where am I feeling that emotion in my body? Or…you can just pause and smile and bring your hand to to your heart and say thank you.

It’s all good.

“If the only prayer you ever said was thank you, it would be enough.” ~ Meister Eckhart

What did you savor today? What could you savor now? Please share your thoughts in the comments below—I’d love to hear from you.

Mindful Self-Compassion Breathing Meditation

Clouds above Pacific Ocean at La Jolla Shores photo by Mary Marcdante
“One for me and one for you.”

As you read that, what did you think? Did you question what I meant? Did you judge it as selfish because I put myself first? Did you feel included? Did you worry about others who might not feel included or just start scrolling?

In my #mindfulselfcompassion teacher training practicum through the Center for Mindful Self-Compassion (an awesome community), one of the core meditations we are practicing is “Giving and Receiving Compassion” using the breath. Any breath you take can become a wish for yourself and another.

If you’re someone who always puts others first, and then feels exhausted, resentful, disappointed or any negative feeling that depletes your energy, research has shown that self-compassionate people tend to be more caring, supportive and compassionate with others, less jealous, and better compromisers. The challenge is giving yourself the same care you give others.

Drawing on the Creative Life Force and breathing in good wishes first for yourself gives you the energy to send it to others.

On your inhale, if it feels right, say “Breathing in for me” and on the exhale, “Breathing out for you.” Or actually, any words that conjure up a feeling of care for yourself and another person or group, country, pet, or the earth. “One for me, one for you.” Or “In for me, out for you,” or even as simple as “Me” on the inhale and “You” on the exhale repeated for as long as you like in a slower-than-normal breathing rhythm while savoring the feelings in your body. Adding a smile can help connect your mind and body and shift your energy from stressed to blessed.

This meditation can be done silently when you’re in a stressful conversation with someone, worried about someone, or just thinking of them. You can do it for one cycle of inhale/exhale that takes just a few seconds or 15 minutes in formal sitting practice, or for a minute when you wake up before you get out of bed, just before sleep, while walking or even sitting on the toilet while you are rationing toilet paper. “One for me. One for you.” Sorry, I couldn’t resist a little levity given how serious everything is with #coronavirusprotocol and #coronavirusstress.

“One for me and one for you. One for All Beings and one for the Earth.”

 

PS. If you like this or have other topics you’d like to learn more about, please leave a comment or share your favorite meditation. I love hearing from you.